I’m not really sure what blogging entails, or what I’m looking to get out of this, but hopefully I’ll learn over time.
I think what I really want is to be able to express myself effectively. Lord knows, when it comes to communication, I am basically the equivalent of a toddler. And not the cute kind, who waddles around saying and doing any random thing, capturing the attention of everyone over how cute he is. No, I’m the boring, awkward toddler who’s been slow to pick up words, slow to learn proper motor skills. Sure, he gets some attention for his fatass cheeks and luscious locks, but that’s about all he’s got going for him. Maybe he gets some cute points for calling the “Subway” the “Taco.” Or for getting excited over scoring my first goal, only to learn that I kicked the ball into my own team’s net.
Since those glorious years, I haven’t lost any of that awkwardness (it’s grown exponentially), my cheeks are still unnaturally large, and my hair, while maybe not luscious, is definitely unruly. The curse of the Jews.
Back to communication. I just…can’t do it. Verbally, that is. It’s really bad. It’s as if my mind completely shuts down when I’m in certain situations or with certain people, and coherence is completely thrown out the window. Obviously, at 19 years old in a highly competitive school and soon to be entering a highly competitive pool of graduates seeking (floundering, in my case) employment, this is something that needs to be worked on. Intensively.
Like most plans, that one will probably be put on the backburner, in favor of more pressing needs. Like sleep. Which I should be doing now, but, you know, I’m such a crazy badass college kid. Obviously.
Anyway, to compensate for my verbal ineptitude, I’ve had to at least be somewhat proficient at writing. My English Lit professor at least seemed to think I was alright. And she was great, so that means her opinions are too.
So I’d say this makes me about 68% towards being a functioning human being. Of course, that number probably declines once other aspects of myself are contemplated, which will probably consume a large portion of this blog. But self-analysis is important, you know? You can’t form relationships without knowing yourself well, and being content with yourself, at least to some degree. Which probably accounts for my plethora of friends. Oh, wait.
Who knows, maybe I’ll raise that percentage over time. My goal is to get to 82%. A solid B-.