I kind of thought I’d be the traveling expert by now, but now that I’m just one week away from leaving for Ghana, all of my familiar insecurities, anxieties, fears, and doubts are starting to surface. Study abroad had been the college experience I looked forward to the most over the years, but right now I’m trying to not have thoughts of “What the Hell am I doing?!” implant itself permanently in my mind. It’s probably normal that I’m nervous, that I’m second-guessing myself a little bit. I mean, this is almost 5 months of being away in a completely foreign environment. For somebody who
always sometimes feels awkward in new social situations, this is going to be my biggest test yet. Yes, I’ve traveled alone before, but I’ll be gone for a substantially longer period of time and will have to, you know, study and stuff, at the same time that I make my probable possible social blunders.
Luckily, mingling with my feelings of doom and gloom is excitement. I don’t have many passions, but traveling, visiting new places, experiencing other ways of life top the list. I’m really looking forward to living, learning, and working in Ghana and I know it will be a really amazing experience for me going forward both academically and professionally. Since, ya know, I’m such an academic and professional person and all. And while I make a big deal about how socially…stunted…I am, I always seem to end up with at least a couple friends wherever I end up…even if it takes a bit longer than most for these friendships to form. I’ll have to be patient, but also make some kind of effort. Or maybe I’ll get lucky and everyone in the program will have a bizarre predilection for borderline-embarrassing 20-year-old boys. Yeah. I’ll go with that.
I’m prepared for this to be hard, at least at first, and it’ll be really important to have and do things that ground me, to help when I’m overwhelmed. Updating this blog frequently will be a part of that, and I can’t wait to share everything! Hopefully I’ll find some time during Orientation/before classes start on August 13 to give an update. I’ll give a detailed explanation of what classes I take, where I end up working, and what else the program has in store for me when I know that myself! Gosh…I really know nothing. Yikes.
pray for me, thanks for reading! Here’s my current song obsession: